train ramblings after a couple asked me to move so they could sit next to each other. The date is yesterday.

Belligerence can be my friend too.

I'm not exactly sure what that means, but I can only hope that I will be repaid with something beyond fallacies and sobriety.

I'll explain what i mean by that as soon as I figure that out.

Maybe that means another drink?

maybe that means too many things.

All I know is I have triggers too, and all I can do it ride them out. I've never been one for self denial. Self discipline, maybe. At times. But there is a difference between discipline and denial, even though they may be related.
That is why I will not be ending my love affair with nicotine anytime soon.

Actually that explains more things than I'm comfortable with explaining to myself.

Andrew Jackson, all I'm asking...I forget the words, but that's where I'm headed.

And then I feel harder, better, and stronger....but not faster.

God bless hip hop. I just want to sit and look tough and scare people.

It's the little things, right?

I'm working this into a comedy routine...sorry Kenny.

That's the life that I lead. Sucka MCs are who I please.

I think my tension stems from no caffeine and no nicotine. I have smokes, but nowhere to smoke them. Coffee would be a poor chocie at 9:06 on a sunday night.

Royale with cheese.

I should just ignore the voices.

And of course, Gaga is just plain soothing. Lord knows I love a good remix. Maybe that's what I'll call my first book. Lord Knows I Love A Good Remix. It'll be a poetry book.

I'm getting magic unsecured interwebs somehow. I am intrigued, but also scared that
I'll end up a black female Shia LeBoeuf in Eagle Eye.

That's a shitshow all by itself.

I need a fantastic otherworldy persona. Like Gaga, but useable in day to day life.
As much as I love unitards, and and feathers and bondage gear, that shit doesn't fly at the office. Believe me, I've tried.

Straight trippin.

Straight hyperbole.

The interwebs have disappeared into whatever interweb hole they came from.
Added to the list of things I love: a good horn section/sample.

I'm bringing get the fuck out the kitchen back.

I could work on a train.

This girl is sneezing, and part of me hopes its the plague. But another hour is a long time to breathe the plague in. Plague desire retracted.

On deck: "Ain't NoSunshine" - MJ. Not Casper the overly friendly ghost MJ. Wide nose, nappy hair MJ. Shit. Yes.

Dear notepad: You are saving my liiiiiife.
xoxo, Gossip Girl

Every time I hear this song, I just remember nearly dying at the hands, er wheels of a semi because I was jamming to this song so hard.

I keep hoping bad things happen to people who are probably nice. These reasons are madly irrational.

Ted Leo, take these thoughts away.

Do you believe in something beautiful? Then get up and be it!

Fuck. I can't be friends with Mia. Stupid reproductive peace of mind...

Sick to death of my dependence, fighting food to find transcendence.

If this is a must, then dying is a must. Right now.

I wish I could remember my formal logic shorthand.

You can call me Al. But only because Paul Simon said it was cool.

I want a shot at redemption.

Amy... please please please come back to us. Your vice soaked voice gives me hope.

(Re)Cue B-Boy stance.

I love "Summer Never Ends". I've been all over this song for at least five summers in a row and man, its like a perfect mad hella bbq jam. It's fantastic because its so chill and I just picture all my favorite parts of summer: sunsets, swimming pools, yards, dancing, boozes, sweaty attractive party people doing what they do best...

And dammit on a cracker, I miss the fuck out of Junior Senior. Watch out! We are! Rhythm! Bandits!

And i need to relocate my Secret Garden OBC ASAP. Le sigh.

Also new expression of anger: punch someone in the rectum. If someone's being an asshole, may as well remind them where it is.